1. |
night sky
04:00
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I made friends with a flight of steps upon an empty balcony
and stepped onto the surface of the mind
It must have been a while, since she pouted with a face
looking at me like: “you never call me Nak, you never try”
Another cold night on the top caught walking on the roof
As I fall into another cracked tile
I always thought the moon could inspire if your head’s cocked sideways
So now it’s looking like a fat smile
I’m sorry for neglecting you, I know it’s been a while
Since we met face to face eye to eye
Exhale the warm air, wipe the mirror to the soul
As I tossed all my “sorry’s” in the sky!
Let’s go!
And I wonder if the stars ever sit on God’s terrace
and view me with an equal adoration
And I wonder if the thunder ever trembles at the grumble
of the stomachs of a hungry generation
Another verse for meditation a heart full of prayer
a pocket full of wishes for comets that fly by
Imagination nauseates upon tall places
and it vomits beneath the night sky
And these past few years been the toughest
plundering the comfort out of this rough mattress
I had to gather with the Father on the roof of the palace
reflect upon the tough chapters:
‘Character development,’ ‘theme,’ ‘plot,’ and ‘context’
Discipline is currency for purchasing your progress
And the ‘cover’ and ‘genre,’ but ‘content’s’
the cost of revival: from coffin to onset
I either have an allergy for symmetry
Or baffled at the beauty, captivated by the twinkling
The fashion of the infinite, I’ve not the slightest inkling
But stars flicker reminiscent of the Father blinking
Upon the wings of an eagle, I uplift the people
With freedom and healing that rests in the sequel
Seek first the kingdom, now the tempest is see-through
The voice in your soul is attempting to reach you
Upon the wings of an eagle, I uplift the people
Freedom and healing it rests in the sequel
Seek first the kingdom, now the tempest is see-through
The voice in your soul is attempting to reach you
So pause and reflect we forgot what we look like
Attempt to replicate but never seem to look right
We barter soul for whatever seems to looks nice
We seek truth from the sunrise to goodnight
So give praise by appraising every lesson ever learned
As the warm summer breath comes caressing every Word:
The trail’s full of hurt, though progression is uncertain
Have faith He’s directing every turn
Another confirmation; shooting star passes
I call upon His name refueling a snuffed passion
While the act of uprooting tough habits
Is hard when you lack practice and your stance stays passive
So now I’m back to this movement of active improvement
With passion so ruthless a track to induce it
Subdue comfort: atrophy of mind
I realized, packed, and stashed it all behind
Pageantry of lies and the vanity of style
Just give me God, sky, and a canopy of tile
My eyes feast on the blackest canvas
Time speaks spinning on a backwards axis
It’s like the planet’s doing everlasting backflips
Mystery and Science can’t match the handprint
Infinite musician... universe is music
Strung together seamless celestial legato
When life is so “short” I’m suggesting that God knows
Stars above our heads look a lot like staccatos
It’s a heavenly concerto- creation in progress
Masterful touch as it “accents” the concepts
And no man can fathom this level of complex
Six days had passed like “allegro” then God “rest”
I’m just a kid who sees the night differently
An art gallery of masterful capability
So God bring clarity and send the rain of heaven
For a clear bright night and another waning crescent
Upon the wings of an eagle, I uplift the people
With freedom and healing that rests in the sequel
Seek first the kingdom, now the tempest is see-through
The voice in your soul is attempting to reach you
Upon the wings of an eagle, I uplift the people
Freedom and healing it rests in the sequel
Seek first the kingdom, now the tempest is see-through
The voice in your soul is attempting to reach you
It’s reflection.
Be still.
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2. |
keep moving
04:49
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Little boy is deciding to be man
The handle of a dagger he's sliding it in his hands
Straight face with a decorated battle stance
Separating innocence, a fancy for an avalanche
...Driven as an obsessed villain
An untouched spirit with a blood lust vision-
-Run to the village with a thrill... (now kills it)
-But guilt kills him; now he wish he was a kid again
Like Marines bleed televised, in front of his mother's eyes
Rudder on Titanic, (iceberg to its underside)
Sickness in an orphanage; condition where the tummy dies
(I'm crying...) 'cause I miss looking up into a sunny sky...
...Can't stand this house- I ran out
The rain came down, streets looking like celadon-
-Camera pans out, showing the dang clouds-
-All this, now I'm running out of stars I could wish upon?
I'll admit I'm wrong... at least i'm honest
Bothered with a passion like an angry alcoholic-
-Cliche sonnets, (the secrets in my closet)
'Cause Pandoras box ain't enough to hold em all in
So step into the future, and enter a dimension
And sent a picture message to myself in the present -
(But) -pathetic are my efforts... no matter of the quality...
-'Cause even on my Tumblr, my past still follows me.
I...
I keep losing
Will...
It seems useless
Trust...
But deep bruises
God...
Will not move this.
I keep moving.
Let's keep moving
-Never cease to pursue dreams; reach and keep moving
It's funny how it happens; dripping off of my eyelids
The monkey on my back moved on before I did
Walking contradiction; funeral cake...
-What I thought to be fate was a future mistake
-take into consideration every single interference
is another way in which God takes shape
...And all while, I'm trying to find the reason
And waiting for an answer, but changing are the seasons
-A man said, (Nak, it's a simple recipe)
I open up the napkin... it read "open sesame..."
...In one instant, He turned into a gate
And told me I'm the life, I'm the truth, and the way.
...I placed the sword right back in the holster
I took the past, threw it back in ocean
Broke the chain, water dropped from a boulder,
Took the yoke offa my shoulders; (now I'm floating)
The old man chose to reflect
The tar in his lungs from the smoke in his breath-
-Rocks in a chair as he choke on regret
-Thoughts of the bloodshed holding his neck
...With no strength in his legs
He pace with a cane his head down in shame
His hands forever stained, he can't take the pain
Now he waits for his innocence, but... it never came
(he waits for his innocence, but... it never came)
(he waits for his innocence, but... it never came)
(he waits for his innocence, but... it never came)
So don't wait... let's keep moving.
So don't wait... let's keep moving.
So don't wait... let's keep moving.
Don't wait...
Let's keep moving.
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3. |
hourglass
03:20
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Time unravels the layers we need to hide the scars
The rhyme enables the prayer to feed the silent hearts
I dream the least of these will reach into the highest star-
...see the galaxy... gleam across the sky of Mars
We're all broken, but together we are priceless shards
Life's a masterpiece- and pride defile the finest art
...And this place is so dangerous.
...The moon hides away its face... its so ashamed of us
Far from perfect and the little girls are hurting-
-Scars furnishing the surface like their skin and hearts are worthless
Burning... her face into the sour back hand
Since when did "man" turn into a coward's last stand?
-A true man abandons the cannon he can't man
And handles humility down a path can't plan
Time is of the essence to empower rap fans
So my hands'll make a castle with the hourglass sand
Approach the homeless while I'm gloating in this coat of arms
I know it's hard, the snow is harsh- I got a frozen heart -
It's so cold, it got me closing up these open arms-
-I play the hand that's dealt to me; they look like hopeless cards
Cursed inheritance... projecting all my arrogance
to shoot up into heaven now its raining dead seraphim
Like a kitten be kicking a ball of yarn-
-I got... Grace in my heart, my chest, legs and arms
- it hurts to learn the truth... when it surfaces above
I'm lurking in my blood from the person that I love
Better context, drawing the connection...
My efforts for success is for blessing my whole collective
Striving for perfection is a never-ending lesson
- dedication to reception to the funeral procession
It's time for the succession, I'm here lead the chosen-
-Like Moses; with faith that provokes an ocean open
Make way, you clouds, the sun is coming out
So put down your grudges, 'cause time is running out
God, paint the sky, the sun is coming out
Let's learn to forgive, 'cause time is running out
Farewell to the night, the sun is coming out
End all the hate, 'cause time is running out
Grace is renewed when the sun's coming out
So let's learn how to love, 'cause time is running out
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4. |
spirit bomb
02:32
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Special delivery- consider this a victory speech-
I’m a... king to you geeks, start kissing “the feet”
“Fade” cats in the evening- catch a “clip” in your sleep
Stain prints on your sheets and then I “rinse and repeat”
Dribble heat over beats, so simple and sweet:
Responding to drama with a fat dimple and cheeks
The way I’m “souping up” tracks, I guess I’m “pimpin the beat”
The way my flow “kick...” kids flinch to my feet
--My knee thigh leap high like Bruce Lee when my feet fly
Technique so raw I make sushi look deep fried...
...Speech organized like an elite crime
Steeze refined... before I could read lines
--Didn’t come over night, experience “kneads” time
Neat rhymes plus skill be “sweeter” than “key lime-”
-Drop! ...the key ingredients making the “heat rise”
Possibilities are “endless,” but Anak eats “Pi” (pie)
Hip Hop! It’s the essence, and it’s deeper than appearance, y’all
Hip Hop! The independent scene is reaching through your speaker, dog
Hip Hop! Never ending legacy passing the lyrics on
So hold your -arms to the sky like we casting a Spirit Bomb
My mic check is like a hard right-left to your tight chest
A slight Shoyruken make you float like a life vest...
...Your “hits” won’t “blow,” more like a light breath
Like Russian vampires... y’all wanna “bite neck (Nak).”
So don’t mind me, I’m just out here to damage ya
Rappers get “sprayed” don’t mettle with my canister
Atomosk, burning galaxies is on my calendar
And making smoke rise like Medical Mechanica
The Full Metal Alchemist out here to merk you
And trans”muting” whack hip hop without a “circle...”
... “Breaking the ‘limits’” of the game like a curfew
Fight until my Ultima Weapon be turning purple
Your first, and last name, quick picture of your face
Erased! I am Yagami Light’ing the place
I push rap forward; I’m a talented engine
Who mastered the rasengan in a matter of seconds
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5. |
take care
02:48
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(Dedicated to a person that I once knew.
Three verses. Three phases of my life.)
Love is patient and kind... it's never angry nor boasts
It always trusts, perseveres, always handling hope
Hate, jealousy and pride, it will never provoke...
I want to learn what it means, God... show me the ropes
Hidden within a lie; been living it every day since
-she traded her identity for misinterpretation
The ache and the strain all the weight made her cave in
(And tricked by the serpent, her faith was forsaken)
[When you left]
My face hit the pavement I prayed for you day- in
day out, raincloud, (hail) precipitation-
-Bathed in my hatred, the pain that you gave me.
I know you never left, just your layers were changing
-Faithfully waiting... the pendulum snapped
All I wanted was my best freaking friend to come back
-You knew best that I never looked better in black
You lost track; but I know you much better than that
Watched you adapt; but felt so tethered and strapped
I wasn't able to grab you when you fell and collapsed
-Your new man can't act like he's quelling the fact:
your name's written in my chest- and you spelled it in caps
I miss you; your rhythm, and your beauty and composure
The distance only boosting my immunity to closure
(It's over) Time's up, all the ticking has stopped
Glimpse at the clock; both hands flipping me off
[Hopeless]
(All the while) I think my sanity is far from my aim's reach
'Cause love and rationality's a fork in the main street
...Unfortunate enough... but of course you betrayed me...
I'm broken like some... sort of a porcelain vase thing-
-quaking, and falling four stories and breaking
...(I want to run away) wherever the Delorean takes me
Like court dates followed by a horrible slaying
-Courting and dating has always found a way enchain me...
(I'm so lucky) I was made to be tossed into a fountain
The toll of the bells... re-sounding my anthem
...Ghost in a shell... now bound to a ransom
Kissed with a witch, rebound with a phantom
...Nak dies when the pride is awakening
...Unshaken by the statements you're making
"The fish in the sea's all yours for the taking"
(You could do better) ...you must not know who I'm chasing
-You disappeared again like a vapor in the wind
And I wish you all the best; with this paper and a pen
[Forgiveness&Hope]
...The last thing we said was "have a nice life."
(Didn't think it was right) so this is my official goodbye:
-God has you on His mind... His plan for you is great.
He doesn't care a minute for the past that you made
...They say that you're dense, but I know you're intelligent.
-And wear sunblock. Your skin is so sensitive.
...And watch out for those animals and plants
Prepare in advance; put that Benadryl in your bag
Pray before you act... -I know best you're impulsive..
Before you come back, leave your stress in that ocean
Stay focused... These guys'll want a date
-If you fall hard, just promise me he's an upgrade
I'm so blessed that you came in my life
We haven't spoken in months... but I pray every night
That one day I might meet the real you yet again.
My best friend. (I'll stay here) I'll end there.
Take care.
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6. |
23 prayers
04:14
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So here I am again. My scalpel is a pen
I’m dissecting every sentence to unravel what’s within.
This battle never ends, and I’ve been grappling ever since
There were days I “couldn’t walk” as if my tassel never switched
And now I figure that the mission’s only bigger
I’m fixed upon the vision, but division’s only bitter.
I drifted then I slipped into the fissure of my prison
But before I even hit it, He delivered my forgiveness.
I took the train and made my way into the city
‘Cause the traffic makes me think more than I want to
I’m waiting for a stranger that’ll be my revelation
‘Cause my brain is too dishonest for its own good
I’m twenty three, still naive to the procedures:
Like asking for a show of hands to seats of open bleachers
I’m hardly confident, at least, I’m only eager
To trying to make a leader out this heap of broken features
Every time I played and tangled with the slavery
I always faked a way to set examples with my bravery
I’m so ashamed, chains generate so painfully
Father, take the yeast: Father take it out my bakery
I want strength, now I’m chasing with relentless
Effort that’ll desolate my selfish independence
Made it on my own, but I know I could’ve grown
Into the man that He wanted but I chose to be alone
My will to be corrected’s like the Spring without the daisies:
The will in my reflection’s like a swing without a base hit
At twenty-three I never thought I’d stumble while I’ve aimlessly
Spilled my recollection of the things I’d never say to me:
I find it’s cutest how deluded you’ve produced conclusions
Think you’re rooted yet obscure with your secluded movements
You’re pretty stupid looking thinking that you’re “suited”
But your “seven deuce” is useless on the “river,” (and you’re fruitless)
Who you fooling? Who you kidding? Why you trying to lie?
Where you looking? What’s your mission? What you trying to hide?
And from the start I knew these words were never mine.
And from the heart, I knew these rhymes were... “never mind” (never mine)
Broken like the fixture of silver that trimmed the mirror
When the fear of my interior split it into its slivers
More than just a battle, truly every waking movement’s
Like the blues and every wavelength vaguely adjacent to it
I know it’s foolish, but expecting takes practice
I took upon my faith, equipped, and dispatched it
God granted passage in seas for thick masses
(So I’m) Wishing for a spectrum in the midst of pitch blackness
Former sense of preparation turns illusion
When the milestones are too large to lift than they used to
Can’t live without you, my God, I want to face You...
Twenty-three prayers from a kid who longs to break through
Father, please forgive me for the arrogance that scars me
And bear within me fruit on every terrace of my heartbeat
Take my selfish, turn it into selfless
And show me the true meaning of repentance
I want to give praise to Your name, but distracted by praises of others
Change my aim, lens, focus, and shutter
Please forgive the fact at times my faith is trapped in the gutter
Please forbid the acts of sin and all its powerful clutches
Please heal the broken baggage that I carry voluntarily
And bury all its merit and the weight that be impairing me
Purify my heart: dismiss the clutches of the briar
Melt away my sickness... I trust in the Messiah
So take away my craving for the lust and the desire
And toss it in the furnace: make it bust within the fire
14, 15. Speak to me Your Will, and Father teach me how to be in it
Take from me my all: for you say there is no median
Place me on the narrow path for when I stray in deviance
And take away whatever if it keeps me in obedience
18. 19. Forgive my: anger, impatience, and pride
20. Forgive those anchors that lay deep inside
I want to be man You called me to be.
And experience the freedom- how you bought it for me.
21. Talking is cheap. So Father, put your arms around me
So I could show em through my life of how you’re conscious of me
22.Bless my: family, fans, and all my friends
23. And show Yourself again and again... Amen
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7. |
no goodbyes
04:00
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If I could, I would tell you in the flesh
But I would never find the right words when it happens
When it comes to moving on: I can't
It's hard for me to "package..." I better "wrap."
Where there ain't no smog that'll saturate lungs
Is the view from the top that'll captivate tongues
I'm speaking in one. But the babbling type
It's the "glory, Hallelujah" at the end of the climb:
That's "Pinnacle." All of the cynical forgotten
Whenever I examine the glory of God's blossom
Beauty. Change. Things a Los Angeles
Suburbian rapper could never fathom with his calculus
Found my soul fading in the comfort
I'm gazing as a wonder like, "what happened to the color?"
I had to leave it, it lead my belief to lead me
To these lavender sweet peas, blue skies and green leaves
It's "The Natural State." I take it God wants me in my natural state
So I thank you. For every good time.
It's time for me to go, but it isn't "goodbye," hold up
It only feels like yesterday
Got a lot on my mind that I want to say
But "goodbye" isn't one of those thoughts, okay?
No man's a plateau, peninsula
Nomad, indigenous, we gotta keep it intimate
Like mission into Nineveh- it's difficult, I know
To walk into a place feeling similar to home
But I found that
People to love, learn from
People to hope, trust, return to
People to fight for, I'm down for you
I really wish that I could stick around for you
I just wish that my actions would accurately
Capture the love that I have for you, madly
I ask your forgiveness, the fact that I'm distant
Been it all my life and my God still fixing
Isn't many reason for the rogue to come to town
For the flower in the autumn lifting arms into the clouds
But you know it the moment that you're around it
I never knew what I was missing 'til I found it
Goodbyes are cold when the hope is forgotten
Hold to the option to flow my synopsis
Mask and distract all the palpable agony
Tossing in bed like the mattress is stabbing me
With a fork in the road. We all know where we gotta go
Our paths might intersect, overlap
Let's be happy 'bout the times when that happens
Let's be glad that we met: it's divinity
Don't forget: we're together in infinity
Though we may separate, disconnect
Remember that our paths come together in the end
It ain't a "goodbye," it's more like "see you there"
Until then, I'll keep you lifted in my prayers
So love God, let's love one another
This is dedicated to my sisters and my brothers, come on
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8. |
anesthesia
03:53
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Let me check your vital signs: heart rate
Beat per minute heart racing
Fear permitted: arm’s length
Hit ‘em with another kiss of the calm tranq
Sanctification an operation
Pain be a doctor we often hate him
Sick ever since that combination:
Death mixed in with the consummation
Now ever since, it’s anesthesia
Numb to the pain of refinement
Woke up and I saw all the evil
And I wanted to return to my blindness
In the land where the dark is immersive
How hard is a heart of a person?
We try to open up, somebody call a surgeon
We wanna come back to the heart of worship
But the dark alluring
Harder to swim in a stronger current
Hotter to live now the water burning
But I feel nothing. “Nada” burden. Not a burden
Feeling no hunger
‘Cause I am numb to the wheel of my comfort
This my diversion a dime to a dozen
I never met death but I flirt with the cousin
First will come love and then marriage
Sleep is the lust you inherit
You cannot stay in your sleep as a means of resolving your flaws
Expecting involvement of God
I want to wake up
I really love sleep, now I want to break up
It’s not you, it’s me
Sleep be the cousin of the eulogy
I can see the stars up in eyes
I can hear Sinatra in my mind
Fly me to the moon, and let me play among the sky
Orion, Ursa Minor, Gemini: constellations die
Three two one. Let the whole body go numb. Let the whole body go numb
Let the whole body go numb. Let the whole body go numb
Like three two one. Let the whole body go numb. Let the whole body go numb
It’s not you, it’s me. Sleep be the cousin of the eulogy
Now obviously, He’s real within me
It doesn’t really mean that I feel Him in me
Feeling envy when I see devotion
Of a brethren steady and he feel emotion
Feet be coasting Spirit leads him
Walk on the land and the sea and ocean
Here I am. I ain’t fronting
I can’t stand that I stand for nothing
I can’t help that my own two feet
Slip more frequent than they move me
When I fall and I hurt, I don’t want to move now
The true definition of “breaking new ground”
What you looking at?
You never seen a man that was broken?
You really want to act like you don’t know the half
And your life is a basket is roses?
You really want to quote me a passage
Claim that you pray that it passes and never call once?
You think I’m convinced of your sadness?
Brother, you just as numb.
I feel nothing. You don’t either.
We’re just talking, we ain’t speaking
Both eyes open, we both sleeping
We want freedom, we won’t reach it
We're scared of the dark
Life is a surgeon: tear us apart
We don’t want pain, and we want to feel numb
Now we could never feel love
I can see the stars up in eyes
I can hear Sinatra in my mind
Fly me to the moon, and let me play among the sky
Orion, Ursa Minor, Gemini: constellations die
Three two one. Let the whole body go numb. Let the whole body go numb
Let the whole body go numb. Let the whole body go numb
Like three two one. Let the whole body go numb. Let the whole body go numb
It’s not you, it’s me. Sleep be the cousin of the eulogy
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9. |
like waves
04:00
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Listen to the ocean breathing. Look at that shimmering sequence
Waves in rhythm leap and they fall in the arms of a beach all season
See warm colors brew: saturation; blue sky turn caffeinated
David playing that magic chord: drew “Hallelujah,” I’m captivated
And it pleased the Lord: masterpiece. “Framed” in His image, He “captured” me
That aperture, that shutter speed that master has what that camera need
And we only got one “shot;” but how could a subject decide the exposure?
We may have the freedom but what do we really exert our control over?
I am not sovereign. I’m just another cog in the locket
He giveth and taketh but who am I questioning God and His logic?
You fluent in ignorance thinking that death isn’t true to his promise
He’s proven to be indisputably ruthless, brutally honest
It’s pretty and all, but what good is it really in building a bond
I told this beach how beautiful it was more times than I ever told mom
I marvel deep in expressing a reverent praise to a body of water when secretly
When hurting, and searching for words to affirm is my cousin who ended his journey too early
I stared at your picture. Stood at your viewing
I knew you were hurting. My stomach is full of excuses
I wanted to help, didn’t know how to do it, the silence is brutal
Maybe refraining from speaking the Truth is just as abusive
I am in tune as I study the wave run from and to, and examine the movement
Whether I want it or not, the water had brought the intention so “clear” to pursue
This is my cue: but I am resistant who am I kidding there isn’t a difference
This was the mission while “we were still sinners:” this is the infinite gift of persistence
I wish I could be like the water that creep up in clutching your ankles
I wish I could be as the sea is repeatedly reaching: so faithful
We get thrown to the bottom to break and are brought to the brink of the fatal
But even the waves stumble and fall, at just the right angle: you see a rainbow
I’m critically short of the virtue I value
Fighting the very same demon that seem to be lurking around you
My only regret are my words of affection are so misdirected
So I came back here trying to talk to God and then He taught me a lesson
Maybe I was too late
I was too concerned with myself
Maybe I was too late
I was too immersed with my realm
Father can you make our love like waves?
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