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Kindred & Closure

from kindred & closure (2020) by nak

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Dedicated to someone whom I love dearly.


- K I N D R E D -
No matter if everything goes
No matter if everything stays
No matter if everything grows
No matter if everything fades
No matter if everything flows
No matter if everything breaks
I know that my love will stay the same: I love you.

'Cause I can’t control what my mind do 
You know this better than I do
I wrote my name and spelled yours by mistake
So I made you this song to remind you
If maybe we’re meant to go separately
I hope we share the same destiny
I know your soul is my melody
Compose a song with a tone from these memories
Watch her smile while she ride on my mood swings
Her eyes are made from these moon beams
I spent the best days of my life with her 
And these days I just think about two things:
That maybe the pieces just don’t fit
Maybe the timing ain’t right yet
I don’t know which is the truth here
But I need you here, that’s the truth, dear
I made you this song to remind you: 
no matter what happens between us
When you feeling lost, any reason
I’ll always be there to come find you
And even if seasons are silent: I mean it
I’m praying to God that He leads you
Provides you the love that you needed
When I was uncertain; I know that I hurt you
And I don't deserve you
But I know that God has a plan and it’s perfect
I’m praying that I will be standing there with you
When you give your vows on that altar
And I’ll be responding with vows of my own
Or I’m seated as part of your audience
No matter if everything grows or everything fades
I know that my love will stay the same: I love you.

- C L O S U R E -
There’s a song that I wrote for an old flame
It's been stuck in my head this past month
I guess the younger me didn’t know what love was but
After meeting you, I think I have a hunch
-back, with my head hung, soul downcast
Tears start spilling off rims of round glasses
Clouds pass; Spring turns Summer
Trading moon beam for sting of burnt thunder
We crumble away out of fear, apprehension
I pray that you see my clear intention
-I thought you needed better; something I’m afraid I’ll never be
While the love you express is a deep I’ll never reach
I couldn’t let you be with me- I can’t reciprocate affection
The fact that I can’t made him question:
I thought love supposed to make you crazy?
If I don’t feel that, maybe I don’t love J*****
Now it’s so long. She moved on
I guess I need to go and do the same
If it wasn’t true love, I’ll recover quick
And I probably should discover but another chick
Clicked with a couple good girls, high quality
Conversation engaging, relatable
But I recognize that none of them compares to you
And I realize to me, you’re irreplaceable
In addition, I was really looking for you
Pangea: you made me feel whole
Didn’t notice how massive your impact was-
Like a crater; my heart’s a black hole
But it’s too late she’s holding someone else now
Had a chance, but you’re still indecisive- bet
She asked him again… if you want her
But you couldn’t bring yourself to say “yes”
‘Cause if I really loved her, I would want the best for her
Someone confident, who’d never rest for her
Someone crazy for her, who would bite every bullet
Someone who could give everything that I couldn’t
I said I didn’t want you but what I’m really saying
Is I don’t want me for you
I figure letting go will-only help you find better
And this is just the best that I could do
My heart bled when you gave me my stuff back
When I saw the heart next to his name
How I cried every night, no appetite
Lost tears, lost hope, lost weight
But let's face it: we're no longer best friends
That’s a role that you gotta give to him, you know
We don’t talk anymore, it’s understandable
So I had to write a song for the world to know
That I love you more than anyone in it
Life without you is bitter: all spinach
Pray till my knuckles white like your skin tone
I notice every white car through my window
Hope you’re standing at the door when the bell rings
I wish that I could show you all of my emotions
And I wish you were there when I’m scared, full of fear
When the doctors uncover diagnosis
I want to watch you succeed and develop
Want to lie in your arms when I’m restless
But I guess we will never be the same again
Now you’re with someone else, I am jealous
I write too many songs for my exes
But I made me a promise I will die with:
That the next love song that I write for a girl
Is the one who I want to spend my life with
Let that sink in. But you deserve better.
All I want is you. But I won’t let you settle.

No matter if everything goes
No matter if everything stays
No matter if everything grows
No matter if everything fades
No matter if everything flows
No matter if everything breaks
I know that my love will stay the same

Now you have two songs


from kindred & closure (2020), released August 28, 2020
- K I N D R E D -
"rooftops and confessions" by Kenai

- C LO S U R E -
"i can't take this" by lxve




nak California

Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him.

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